Kaz S. Matamura

“He was born with a gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad.”

I am bold.  I trust my luck.  I am still capable of “just going for it.”  I’m still leading my life as if I’m writing my fantasy autobiography. My sunny brain and penchant for the positive makes my life easier and brighter. So, to mark the 10th year anniversary of my non-profit company, Fire Rose, I shall share my some of the ingredients that make the recipe for this life of mine.

Trust – I don’t waste energy being suspicious or worried, not because I lack an awareness, but because I surround myself with only trust-worthy people.

In Hollywood, I work with wonderfully creative people.  Paranoia is often based on how one sees and treats others and their expectations of those people.  An individual, who wants to be liked, attracts skillful suckers. These are individuals who will say whatever it takes in order to get what they want.  The rest of us just think the suckers are weird.

No pressure – Most of the time, I am not sure whether I’m playing or working. Pressure doesn’t drive me.  ‘Drive’ drives me. I don’t worry about “making it” or “getting to the top” because I concern myself with the road in front of me.

I’m a perfectionist and I always give my best but I also acknowledge perfection as a creation of the mind, not something external.  Life can be perfect if that perfection comes from living in the moment.  Establishing conditional parameters fences in our freedom. “If I had more money”, “If I had time to…,” “If I had the opportunity…!”

Bottom line: a free-range chicken does not know where the fences are, or what the fences are for, or why there should even BE fences.

Set no limit, no pressure, no expectation.

Simplify – you don’t need much to live, even though it’s a rather hypocritical thing for me to say because I LOVE my toys.  And I admit that I pretty much have everything I need.

My ego “wants” to make a life meaningful, or “wants” to hear George Clooney say to me, “You and I would make great looking children.” But other than that, I don’t have much “want.”  I guess I am a Buddhist by default.  Wait… I am not really a Buddhist if I call myself a Buddhist – because labeling is preventing yourself from just being…. Oy…. Ok…  Forget it.  I am just nothing.

It’s OK to be hateful – as long as it doesn’t come from your self-hatred. List the things you hate – and if it grows from you or you grew from it – that’s self-hatred. I hate onions, but it doesn’t grow from me. So it’s OK to hate onions.  I grew from my parents but I don’t hate them…. Even though they are selfish, loud talking bohemians. If you hate one thing, hate everything equally. I’m a little bit of racist, sexist, ageist – be a well-balanced hater.

Recycle all – If you see trash, you pick it up. The same thing applies to relationships. When you see a Debbie Downer, don’t avoid her. You face her like an Eli Wallach would. You suck all the bad thoughts, energies, and ideas from her and recycle them into good ones. Don’t store it. Instead of “That asshole cut me off”, think, “oh glad the speedy Gonzales didn’t rear end me.” Staying away from negative energy is like being on the Atkins diet. If you avoid it, you are giving too much power to it and you won’t have any immunity. Learn to deal with downers.  It is inevitable.  No one can be happy all the time and   I think happiness is over-emphasized in our society anyway. Conversely, sadness has too much of a bad rep.  We appreciate comedy when we can understand tragedy.

Money – it doesn’t take much to live, but it can cost your life if you pay too much attention to making it. Whatever you do, if you are good at it and stay working hard consistently, you will make money. Possession is not achievement. Only you can own your sense of achievement.  That experience is only thing you take with you, and it is much more valuable than how much money you have in your bank account.

Be flexible in what to believe. I used to believe my classmate Miyama was my soul mate but then I had a change of heart to Aki. He was killed in a traffic accident. Now my definition of my soul mate is “anyone who can put up with me.” I used to believe in Santa Claus, but now I believe that everyone can be a Santa Claus, and I love being one every Christmas.  I’m not a Jew, but I enjoy practical Hanukah gifts, too.

Friends – Be with people who share the same moral value. True friends are lovers minus the passionate French kiss. We respect, trust, and admire one another. We are each other’s fairy godmothers and godfathers.

Create a heaven here. I don’t know what’s going to happen after death. Honestly I don’t think I will ever die.  I used to have some idea about it, but I do not believe in something no one has experienced completely.  Death is an incident and concept.  However, the idea of earning reward points on this planet to go to a better place after you die puzzles me. It is less certain than “mama’s bank” where you see the money go in but you never see it come out.  If I get points on my good deeds, I want to cash in all my points here in this life. Call me a gambler but I’m betting my heaven is RIGHT HERE.

Home is where you rest – Have an oasis.  It could be a bathtub, a park bench listening your kids laugh, or a local pub.  Always know how to recharge yourself. My lover’s arm is where I surrender all the power games and preconceptions of how life should be.  Every night I thank him for being there for me, and every morning I am excited to explore another day with him.  But then, I do the same things with my pumpkin plants. Go figure.

Stand for something – You can see more standing up tall than sitting and resting. We have amazing freedom in this country, and it makes me smile that every individual enjoys it fully.  Each one of us is responsible for our own empowerment and inspiration.  I do not rely on others for empowerment, but I DO want to be with the people with bright eyes. Find your tribe – people that cherish who you are, and expand your compassion outside of your tribe members.

One of the things I’m still learning is how to slow down and smell the roses. I struggle with just stopping to have fun. I AM having a great deal of fun, but wouldn’t it be more fun to keep watering roses along the way to make our path a little bit prettier for the next generation?